May 28, 2012

The Words that Get Confused with Other Words

I've seen such posts all over the interwebs addressing the issue of our society's decrepit spelling, but they never address the issues that I really have a beef with. Am I the only one who notices?

Whenever people make these mistakes, they make me think of this girl. English is a crazy language, I know, and the spelling makes no sense, but if my immigrant parents can get these words right, then so can anyone. Remember this?

You know what I mean.
"But Noor, why do you care so much?" Because A) I love language, A.5) You should love language too, and B) I used to be an English teacher. And C) With such an emphasis being placed on typed communication, isn't it important to know how to spell?

Here are a few words that people always seem to confuse with other words that aren't the word they meant to use.

In case you were wondering, I actually look like that.
#1.

What people say: "Weary/Wary"

 What they meant: "Wary/Weary"

Weary is when you're tired. Wary is when you're... hesitant. I, personally, am weary of seeing wary when I notice people meant to say wary when they said weary and weary when they meant wary. The kicker? They aren't even pronounced the same. I understand if people have problems spelling - that's totally fine - but when the word isn't even said that way... it makes me cry. Inside. Because I'm a man and men don't cry on the outside. Supposedly.

#2. 

What people say: "Loose/Lose"

What they meant: "Lose/Loose"

This one kills me. Here's an adage that I just made up to help out anyone who has trouble with this: If your shit's loose, you're gonna lose it. Get it? Because if it's loose, meaning not tight, you'll lose it, meaning no longer have it in your possession. And like weary/wary, these words are also not pronounced the same way.

#3.

What people say: "Allusion/illusion/elusion"  
What they meant: To sound smart.

No one understands what the fuck you're trying to say when you use such words.

That's it for spelling. Those three are the ones that needed some review. Things like they're/their/there and too/to/two have been addressed to death by other people, and at this point, I don't even care anymore. So let's move on to...

My right side is my good side.
#1.

What people say: "Warsh"

But that word doesn't have a(n): "R" in it.


Dear the Midwest and a whole fucktonovalotta other places,

STOP IT. JUST STOP IT. MY EARS CAN'T LOSE ANY MORE BLOOD OVER THIS.

Sincerely,

A concerned citizen.

#2.

What people say: "Expecially"

But that word doesn't have a(n): "X" in it.

"Especially" is spelled... well, like that. And that's an "S", kiddies. Remember, "S" goes ssssssss. Like... umm... like a snake! Snakes go ssssssssss. Unless they're choking. Then they go urrrkkkkkk. This rule also applies to the word "espresso". Anyway, here's an illustration.

His name is Pablo and he likes rabbits.
Poor Pablo.
Also, if anyone knows how to put pictures side by fucking side in Blogger please let me know because I wasted probably eleven minutes trying.


Moving on, here's the final lesson.


Just fyi, that's an eraser and a piece of chalk. I don't want rumors starting.
#1.

I know that punctuation has nothing to do with spelling, but I needed to say something. Don't you hate it when you see status updates or comments that look like this:

~*omg so today i totaly wante dto go to the beach with my fraaaaaands but i cudnt cuz it was so cold toddday and i rlly didt wan go to the beach when it was so cold o wel i gues thrs alwys tmrow rite hahahahlmaoroflolololololOLOLLOLOLPOPAIHJSKLHF!!K!J!!!!!*~

I sure do. Pass on the lesson of punctuation. And also the lesson of paying attention to what's being typed.

That's all. Class dismissed.

13 comments:

  1. All of these kill me as well, and I have to add: unnecessary apostrophes. Seriously people, just take a shit right on my face instead.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooooh unnecessary apostrophes. I hate those. "Those are lots of duck's". Lots of duck's what? Lots of duck's feet? In which case, that would be "lots of ducks'". Agreed.

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  2. You are all kinds of hilarious. I'm so glad I found this. I'm on your side 100%.

    This part:

    "Dear the Midwest and a whole fucktonovalotta other places,

    STOP IT. JUST STOP IT. MY EARS CAN'T LOSE ANY MORE BLOOD OVER THIS.

    Sincerely,

    A concerned citizen."

    Made me laugh pretty hard.

    Your blog is sweet. I'll be back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey thanks! And I'll be hitting up your blog too. I like that diamond earring story haha.

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  3. I too am a concerned citizen!! My two cents: than/then, then/than... ARG! And when idiots who are in smart-people positions say "supposably" instead of "supposedly" in a meeting with other managers present. Um?? Who did you have to in order to get promoted when you clearly are so dumb?? OK, now I have to go classify my anger level. BYE.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Lord, than/then... My nemesis. Also, on the "supposably" note, I also hate "supposevly". And things like "pacific" instead of "specific". Obviously whoever taught those people how to speak had a constant mouthful of potatoes.

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  4. When I hear an "R" in wash I can't help but visibly shudder. Gross and wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Punctuation win:
    http://weknowmemes.com/2012/02/stop-clubbing-baby-seals/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Holy shit. Yes. Those silly baby seals. They're out of control.

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  6. For putting pictures side by side, you use this:

    [table border="0"]
    [tr]
    [td][a href="PIC 1 URL" target="_blank" title="View"]
    [img height=300 width=250 src="PIC 1 URL" alt="pic name"/][/a][/td]
    [td][a href="PIC 2 URL" target="_blank" title="View"]
    [img height=300 width=250 src="PIC 2 URL" alt="pic name"/][/a][/td]
    [/tr]
    [/table]

    Where I put [ or ], use < or >. Blogger is being a stupidhead and telling me that is unacceptable HTML for a comment. Adjust height and width to what you need them to be. The rest is pretty self-explanatory. You can have as many or as few as you want in the row.


    Also, I loved the choking snake visual. I hope someone gave him the Heimlich maneuver.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my God. Thanks so much for that info. I was beside myself with rage trying to figure out how to do it. I never would have figured out all that html by myself.

      I'm glad you liked the snake! I was hoping someone would comment about him. I was really proud of that snake. Don't worry- he's okay now.

      Delete
    2. I'm not even going to pretend I figured out the html by myself. It took a lot of Googling (actually Binging) to find it a while ago. I'm usually to lazy to actually use it anyway. And I'm so glad the snake is okay!

      Delete